Every time I start to feel like I'm winning I have to stop and I realize there is no such thing as winning or losing. It's a never ending battle to survive this illusion these thoughts in between whats real and not real mean. If there is such a thing I don't know. Most of the time I feel like i don't even live in this world. I'm the last one of my kind... waiting for the shuttle to come and pick me up and take me back home to where I belong to where love is freely given all the time